Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Earning My Pay On My Knees

Today at work, I got rug burns on both my knees and elbows from being on them for most of the day. The jolting and rocking, first on my knees, then on my elbows and knees, then back on my knees again, repeated so often that the skin on them became inflamed and raw. This was all under order of my director, who put my job on the line, contingent upon my ability to abide by his wishes and succumb to his will. I certainly wouldn’t have done anything of this sort, at least not at work, but it was at his insistence and I was powerless to deny him. I had to submit.

Okay, perhaps there was a part of me that was interested in this. I mean, well, it could be fun. Maybe I would enjoy it. Maybe I could make use of it later, with someone who deserved it. Maybe I’d unlock a part of me that secretly yearned for subjecting myself to this kind of service. Maybe it would be good for me and illustrate to my boss that I have skills he didn’t know I had.

When it was finally over today, I was exhausted and sore and was then told to clean up all the body fluids I’d somehow allowed to spray and drip, which, considering how hard I was working, was truly beyond my ability to control. It was a little undignified, but I’ve been through worse.

So, I still have a job, and the director thanked and congratulated me on doing well. For now I am certified in CPR and AED.

2 comments:

Leelu said...

Excellent. :D

Amanda (the librarian) said...

ROFL!! Fabulously funny post! Wish I could share it. Thanks for making my day!