Monday, December 8, 2008

Brain, What Are We Doing Tonight?

Next week at one of our committee meetings at work, someone from a nearby library will be paying us a visit. She is a blog reader who has never met me, but happens to know my director-type-guy and he invited her over for a consult.

Now, I’ve actually become friends with a few of my readers, and there are very, very special people out there like Leelu, Sheila, David, Phil and A-V Boy who have truly been more like friends than pen pals, or in the case of Leelu, she is my younger, fraternal twin, borne of other parents. But I have never met any of them in real life. People like Natalie and Allison have come close. Natalie’s been in the library and successfully identified many of the folks I’ve mentioned, though she couldn’t make it to the Kool Kids gathering I invited her to, unfortunately. Allison met a few folks and befriended our director-type-guy (whose name she cannot remember, but calls him Book Club Guy), and she remains the only blog reader I’ve ever spoken with on the phone (partially because I just do NOT talk on the phone socially, and, well, she called me at work so I couldn’t avoid it). Yet, I have somehow managed never to be face-to-face with anyone who started off as a blog reader. That I know of. Because I would hope they’d say something.

Anyway, I have a week to prepare and I’m looking for suggestions about how to handle this.

NO, I’m not nervous or anxious. But I would like to goof on her just a little.

Should everyone on the committee put temporary blue dye in their hair so she can’t spot me so easily?

Should we be as boring as possible and send her away thinking that everything I’ve ever written was a humongous lie?

Should we hire a stripper to entertain during the meeting and pretend like it’s business as usual?

Should we conduct the meeting in one of the infamous dirty washrooms and scream if she touches something like she is somehow forever soiled?

Should we act like morons? (As if this suggestion was any different from the aforementioned ones.)

Should I act like a moron? (If I accidentally act like a moron, have I sufficiently covered my ass?)

What should I do? Any good suggestions out there?

Or is it enough that I mentioned her here and now she’s probably wondering what I’ll write about her afterward?


Anonymous said...

Hey now!...I can *remember* Book Club Guy's name. I just prefer to call him Book Club Guy. And you can't make fun of me, because you call him director-type-guy ;-)


P.S...why didn't I get an invite to the Kool Kids gathering?

Happy Villain said...

Girl, you have a standing invite anytime! Whenever you get your buns up here. You're right, though. It is more fun to call him by his non-names. I don't know what else to call him *here* because he's the temporary director and he still doesn't get to sit in the big chair. But it's better than some of the other names he is called, including the new one, Jimenez (pronounced HEEEEEEEEE men ez), which cracks me up. He's SOOOO not a Jimenez.

Leelu said...

I think you should dye your hair some other color, just to throw her off. Perhaps blonde? *gigglesnort*